Avodah Mailing List

Volume 41: Number 2

Thu, 05 Jan 2023

• 1. Yehudah Tamar (Rabbi Meir G. Rabi)
• 2. Today, January 3rd, 2023 is the fast of Asara B?Teves. Is it permissible to rinse one?s mouth with mouthwash? (Prof. L. Levine)
• 3. Yaakov?s pragmatic (not philosophical) reactions (Joel Rich)
• 4. bounded by rules? (Joel Rich)
• 5. Old Time Religion (Prof. L. Levine)

Thank you for appreciating my humour, Rabbi Lampel, sometimes it goes
straight through to the keeper - if you know cricket you will know what I
mean.

Probably this is not a case of the Beis DIn [as per the Maharam Shif, thank
you Rabbi Lampel] but of the court of public opinion - there would be
insufficient evidence to prove Y is the father but enough dirt to cause
character assassination, probably lifelong. And perhaps the main issue was
his deceiving T and holding her hostage - is there any suggestion in Chazal
that he was wrong on this count or is there no need to say the obvious?
Therefore, the reference from the Abarbenel, thank you Rabbi Lampel, seems
a little jarring - even if he feared she was the cause of the death of his
first two sons, was it right to hold T hostage and deceive her?

It seems that sometimes [often] people only realise and reach their
potential when put to the test, when put under pressure - there is the
celebrated case of the Yid who agreed to be the first to enter and plunder
the Beis HaMikdash with the promise that he could take and keep WHATEVER he
wanted when the goyim themselves were too terrified to enter and defile
that holy place.

He came staggering out with the Menorah - which the lowlife immediately
said - we did not mean THAT, oh no that is something for a royal household,
for a king, you go back and take something else - and this same Yid who
only moments earlier managed to violate the sanctity and concede the
victory of HKBHs enemies, refused to re-enter and was martyred - Yesh Kono
Olamo BeShaA Achas!

Perhaps we might consider that Y also failed to recognise and realise his
greatness until T set him up and he declared Tzadka MiMeni.

As for T relying on his integrity to save her life - that is prohibited in
Halacha. Not only for her to herself but also for her to place Y in such a
terrible position - Lifney Iveir.

Which also seems to fit into Chazals understanding that she LOST the
passport and drivers licence - because she fully intended to submit them to
Y and was certain that he would either marry her himself or to Sheilo or
send her away with a chaperone to either return with husband or with an
adopted baby or not return at all.

When she lost them she had no option - could not escape as a lone
unprotected woman, so she just awaited her fate recognising that the lost
passport was Min HaShamayim - as was her falling pregnant, even though she
engineered the setup.

As to Rabbi Lampels query - what is the intent within T words, Haker Ess
BoraAcha VeAl Tisbayeish MiBasar VeDam perhaps the meaning is don not just
DO the right thing, BE PROUD of doing the right thing - be proud when
serving HKBH particularly when it is difficult.

Halachah actually requires [yes yes, I know some opinions disagree - but I
do not get it, why in all other matters do we pursue every possible
opinion, certainly the major ones, but in matters such as these we take the
easy escape route??] that one PUBLICLY declare their transgressions that
are interpersonal, especially when the injury was of a public nature - the
purpose is not to shame but to ELEVATE. You are a human, humans sin; but
only angelic Gd fearing people have the perspective that allows them to
realise that when they publicly admit they are sanctifying HKBHs reputation.

Rabbi Lampel, can you please explain your comment - had T told Y BEFORE she
was noticeably pregnant, that would have destroyed their relationship - why
was it different when she made the revelation, privately, AFTER it was
common knowledge. If anything he would have MORE DISTRESSED that she did
NOT disclose it earlier when he would have had a chance to remain anonymous.

Unless, he would NOT BELIEVE that she was pregnant. Butin that case he
could at least send her away with a chaperone or go away with her and
Sheilo for an extended period.

Furthermore, and indeed the essence of our Q - she could have, SHOULD have,
conveyed that message to him even without the passport - she certainly knew
enough detail to convince him that her story was true. She was NOT
DELIBERATELY trying to publicly out T, as she handed over the evidence to
Y. So what was her plan?

Also, Rabbi Lampel, please explain because I dont follow your train of
thought, why you write near the end of your post, that - had Y chosen to
cover up his failure to marry T either to Sheilah or himself, would strip
Tamar of her dignity and life, but it would leave his own public image
unscathed. Apparently, that Yetzer Hara to not admit to his mistakes and
failure was very, very, strong.
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From today's OU Kosher Halacha Yomis:


Q. Today, January 3rd, 2023 is the fast of Asara B?Teves. Is it permissible to rinse one?s mouth with mouthwash?

A. Shulchan Aruch (OC 567:3) writes that one should not rinse their mouth
with water on a Taanis Tzibur (such as Asara B?Teves), even if they are
accustomed to doing so every morning. The Mishna Berura (567:12) indicates
that it is also prohibited to rinse one?s mouth with vinegar, though
vinegar is not potable. Nonetheless, the Mishna Berura (567:11) writes that
one who is in great discomfort may rinse their mouth with water or vinegar,
provided they tilt their head downward, so they do not inadvertently
swallow. The Aruch Hashulchan (567:3) is even more lenient. He allows
rinsing with water or vinegar if the head is tilted downward, even if the
person is not in distress.

The Be?er Moshe (8:94) allows those who have bad breath to rinse with
mouthwash, if they will otherwise be embarrassed. Furthermore, he notes
that since it is unhealthy to drink mouthwash and people are careful not to
swallow any amount, mouthwash may be used even without tilting one?s head
downward. (Though vinegar is not potable, it is not unhealthy, and
therefore vinegar has the requirement of head tilting.) Sefer Kinyan Torah
(2:49) disagrees with this last point and equates mouthwash with vinegar.
In any event, if one is in discomfort or is embarrassed, there is agreement
that one may rinse with water and vinegar by tilting the head forward, and
according to the Be?er Moshe, mouthwash can be used even without the
tilting precaution.

Professor Yitzchok Levine
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Anyone comment on the parallels of Yaakov?s pragmatic (not philosophical)
reactions in Toldot (27:12) (maybe my father will find me out) and in
Vayishlach (34:30) (maybe the locals will destroy me/us)?
KT
Joel Rich
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To J Haidt:
First, let me say I really enjoy your work, especially The Righteous Mind
in getting a better understanding of some of the differences in America
today. Unfortunately, recognition of this issue doesn?t seem to be making
things much better just yet. [image: ?]
Full disclosure I am an Orthodox Jew, who has been wondering about the
organizing principle of atheists, in particular the question of why one
should feel bound to any set of rules once you know it?s all
evolution/culture that causes the development.
My question was with regard to your Happiness Hypothesis final chapter. You
differentiate between two questions ? why do they all exist, and how can I
find a sense of meaning and purpose. If I understand your analysis
correctly, the unstated principle is that our personal happiness is the
measure of finding a sense of meaning and purpose. You then provide your
understanding of the research as to how to find happiness. Assumedly
personal happiness is up to each individual to define? If so, if John?s
personal happiness is defined by clubbing baby whales, then he should seek
to maximize it irrespective of study results? Or generally once one
realizes that there is no answer to the holy question then why should one
feel bound to any societal definitions of what is ?good?. in particular how
would one respond if they received the ring of Gyges ?

Thoughts?

KT
Joel Rich
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Are you interested in authentic Ashkenaz minhagim?  If so, go to

https://moreshesashkenaz.org/en/guide

and download either the Hebrew or English versions at

Guide to Minhag Ashkenaz

27 Shevat 5772

????? ????? ????? ??????
Guide to Minhag Ashkenaz (Hebrew)
Bnei Brak, 5774

Table of Contents<https://moreshesashkenaz.org/mm/publications/MadrichTOC.pdf>
| Full Document<https://moreshesashkenaz.org/mm/publications/Madrich.pdf>
(pdf)

Guide to Minhag Ashkenaz (English)
by Rav Binyomin Shlomo Hamburger
Translated by Rav Reuven Poupko
Bnei Brak, 5769

(Note: The English version is outdated with respect to the Hebrew version.)

Table of Contents<https://moreshesashkenaz.org/mm/publications/MadrichEnglishTOC.pdf>
| Full Document<https://moreshesashkenaz.org/mm/publications/MadrichEnglish.pdf>
(pdf)

In the English version take a look at, for example, section IX Marriage.

Today's marriage practices are certainly much different than those described in this document.

Professor Yitzchok Levine
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